I Knew We Were On To Something With This Hangover Clinic Idea!

Not sure if these two are related, but I like to think so . . .

“las vegas saline iv hangover cure service” (4/5/11)

“what is the most annoying thing a boy can do” (4/5/11)

What Do You Mean “Is Your Mother Jewish?” . . . Racialist Moron . . .

“noel biderman a jew?” (1/30/09)

“roger barnett billionaire jewish” (1/30/09)

“randy levine jew” (1/31/09)

Three and it’s a trend. Ah, the cesspool that is the web . . .

Poor Tina Turner

“simply the best better then the old the rest” (12/16/08)

Hey, when you’re 69 why don’t you run around a stage for two hours in three-inch heels . . .

I Don’t Know, Is She Still Single?

“should i take the turkey out now” (11/23/08)

Yes, yes, now! Oh wait — we’re still several days away, aren’t we?

Is Our Children Googling?

“one day a slug fell into a hole that was nineteen meters deep each day he climed up 4 meters at night he slid down 2 meteres how many days did he climb out of the hole?” (10/5/08)

Do the math, lazy-ass!

Rate My Professors Has Gone Too Far

“richard bulliet sexy” (7/13/08)

Dr. Bulliet, I respectfully suggest that you should please quit spreading this meme . . .

I Suppose Then You’ll Feel Like You Have Carte Blanche To Tap It, Too?

“entitled to tap ass” (6/1/08)

Not on our watch, you won’t. Fascist.

Huh?

“jew man sneaker simpson street bronx” (5/27/08)

Oh, of course, the Jew Man:

The thing that was interesting about shopping for sneakers in the Bronx during my teen years was that we used to take the train all the way from the tip of the North East section of the Bronx to Simpson St. and Freeman St. in the South Bronx. That was where you could buy your sneakers, and Jordache and Sassoon Jeans. Now let me get to the interesting part. We used to call every store in that section, or at least two of them, Jew Man. Now this is meant as no offense to anyone, but I suppose the proprietors were Jewish. But the thing was if something cost $35 and you only had $30, you could do what we call in New York, Jew them down, to $30. Again, no offense meant. It was cool to come back to the block and ask someone what they paid for their gear and to boast that you got the same thing for a lower price.

Not To Sound Fuddy-Duddy, But What’s This Generation Coming To?

“how to pickpocket at school” (5/26/08)

And for added effectiveness, why not try the special ed kids first?

So Stuck Up!

“cos i simply the best better than all the rest” (5/12/08)

How Yahoo’s Latest Ad Campaign Fails . . .

“search up the ying yang” (3/25/08)

Stay the hell away from my ying yang!

The Good News Is You Got That Big Summer Associate Placement . . .

“milbank tweed drug test” (3/12/08)

. . . the bad news is you have to cut your hair . . . all of it.

Just Asking . . .

“masturbating while parked in your own car and charged for lewdness is considerd what degree of misdeameanor if found guilty” (3/11/08)

. . . just asking for a friend, that is.

Maybe You Can Also Explain Why My Fish Smells Like Dick . . . Asshat

“my dick smells fishy” (3/6/08)

Ugh. Keep your thoughts to yourself.

Can’t DARPA Somehow Create A Red-Light District For The Web?

“cesarean pornography galleries” (3/2/08)

Please, please tell me you’re joking . . .

What Neil LaBute Hath Wrought

“craigslist.com fucking cock single woman deaf” (3/1/08)

Look, this is the second time I’ve seen this one and I just want you to know that I’m not happy about it . . .

TGIF!

“crack rock she lit crack pipe sizzled pleasure” (2/28/08)

. . . Oh, what a relief it is . . .

Like Man Bites Dog . . .

“saw penis jerking off man sitting subway” (2/26/08)

It’s usually the other way around, no? Regardless, it shouldn’t have happened.

Lord Won’t You Fuck Me In Your Mersadies Benz . . .

“when i was 16 i boght my first mersadies benz must have fucked 1000 bitches and they girlfreinds” (2/11/08)

And they said you wouldn’t amount to anything after you dropped out of school at 14!

But Is It Really So Wrong? Is It?

“is it wrong to take items from a restaurant table?” (2/4/08)

No, not at all — after all, it’s not like you’re stealing or anything. And while we’re at it, if you decide you don’t like your meal, feel free to walk out without paying.

Who Let The Blogs Out?

“dog fucking blogs” (2/2/08)

Three of the most annoying people combined into one: dog lovers, zoophiles and the self-obsessed.

Everything From The 1980s Is Back In Fashion In The Expensive Areas Of Brooklyn

“williamsburg cocaine” (2/1/08)

I guess plans for hipsters to cut back on their blow consumption in 2008 have failed.

You’re New At This, Right?

“sex short stay hotel downtown manhattan” (1/30/08)

Do those even exist there anymore?

More Proof That You Should Never, Ever Trust Alan Cumming To Do What He Says He’s Going To Do

“cumming inside a woman after promising to pullout” (1/29/08)

But the real question is how he got in there in the first place . . .

It Wouldn’t Have Been A Problem If My Sessions Hadn’t Always Started At 4:20

“dont tell your therapist you smoke pot” (1/28/08)

I know, because the sneaky bastard always goes behind your back and rats you out to your wife!

What Happened In Vegas Stays In Vegas On Surveillance Tapes Too Long

“how long do strip clubs save surveillance tapes?” (1/25/08)

Wouldn’t your wife/girlfriend like to know?

What’s The Poop?

“merril lynch guy pooped on bonus” (1/24/08)

Shouldn’t he feel lucky he still has a job?

But here’s the deal — it wasn’t poop; it was shit.

New Heights Of Tastelessness

“cory lidle jokes” (1/15/08)

God, you’re horrible. But since you asked, there are some.